Guilty

I went to sleep last night in fear, woke the same way.  After the Indiana primary, we are clearly facing 6 more months of hate-filled political rhetoric.  Words that will pull us apart, encourage violence, give permission to be our worst selves.  As I was perusing my morning news feed, I saw a clip of Senator Cruz elbowing his wife as he was hugging everyone on stage during his concession speech.  I immediately shared this with my niece and then with my husband.  “You have to see this, it is really funny.”  My chef watched and asked what was funny about it.  This from the man who loves slapstick comedy, will laugh at the same Jackass stunts over and over.  I mumbled something about the look on her face and walked away.  Guilty.  I fell into the trap, I just that easily, because I am human and had no coffee yet. I shared and made fun of someone’s lowest point.

I went to sleep in fear and woke up the same way.  The only way to combat this is with deep faith that our God is bigger than Mr. Trump and the KKK.  I have to consciously practice kindness and look for opportunities to show grace.  I need to demonstrate conflict resolution and take down walls.  I must must, must follow the teachings of my Jesus who’s only extremist plan was that we love everyone, even Mr. Trump.  I am appalled at my behavior and vow to atone by being nice today.  The whole day. I am going to resist reading my newsfeed, instead reading the Word.  I think I will find others there who have struggled with fear, humanity, worst selves.

2 Samuel 24:14

Then David said to Gad, “I am in great distress. Let us now fall into the hand of the LORD for His mercies are great, but do not let me fall into the hand of man.”

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